Sometimes i hate how loving you makes me feel.
All i can do is writhe in my bed wishing these feelings of sorrow and jealousy would depart.
I know they will,
I just wish i knew when.
The days i end our time together in regret and hurt make me wish they never happened at all.
Jealousy is truly something ill never escape.
Being a first choice may stay my most wanted and least attainable wish.
You make me feel every emotion in the book.
Sometimes it makes emotions worth having.
Other times i wish i never had them at all.
Loving you is the worst gamble of my life.
I win yet my losses are just as detrimental.
Making me remember ive never truly won.
Yet even after everything, i love still you.