I’ve been happy recently, ever since I’ve given my life to God I’ve found new reasons to be happy after our breakup, but it pains me knowing that I’m getting better and you’re still hurt, I’d still do anything to get you back and do everything 100% right this time, i really am learning, I wanted to love you honestly but was doing it the wrong way, I’m still deeply in love with you, I’m effectively letting go, but I’ll never move on from you, I’ll never move on from that laugh, that smile, our memories, so many things that I’ll NEVER replace, I want you to find your place in heaven with God, Ik you aren’t the biggest believer but he’s real baby, and he’s watching you through these tough times waiting for you to call on him for help, I wish we could’ve worked things out, I never wanted to lose you, I wanted to propose to you during summertime this year, I was ready for the big steps with you, but our relationship was failing bc of my own issues that I couldn’t see bc I disguised it with love, I’m sorry I loved you too much, I’m sorry I saw you as God, I’m sorry I pushed you to perfection so much, I wish I’d seen it sooner, I still believe in us even if you don’t, even if years pass by, I’ll still have open arms for you, nobody could ever bring me the joy that you did, you were my everything, God knew I wasn’t spiritually where I needed to be so we can take those big steps, I’m sorry for hurting you so much and pushing you away, I understand we may never speak again, but I’ll never stop loving you Nyasia, never, please grow with Christ, please fix your mental health, please get help if needed, please quit the bad habits, I just want you to be ok again, even if we don’t talk, Ik you too well, Ik you aren’t healthy rn and I wish I could be there to help you, but I can’t, I miss you, I love you forever and always, I wish we could’ve worked things out and be together again, hopefully it be God’s will
He told us we were each others person, each others meant to be, you have to know we’ll come back together, let no man separate what God brought together, separation creates strength, it helps me lose my anxious attachment, we can get better for each other, I’ll continue to pray over you every night, I love you
-Buttbutt