i feel terrible for ur girl and yall’s future. like im glad i never entertained this even in a manipulative way and gave u hope bc this is what would happen. u been together for yrs, built a home/a family/whatever you want together and one day she’ll find out and maybe your family maybe ur own family. i think that would be just the worst thing. to find out ur spouse/child/dad/friend did something like that and kept it hidden. i think even trying to trick u for answers by being however is not good bc it just tells u that whatever u want, u are entitled to. i want no part in something like that. i dont know what i can do to make u realize that. perhaps good advice wont be taken. i think u want ur closure, ur validation, something that’s not good. but, idk. u wont receive anything from me i said that. idk what things from back then u want me to answer. tbh we never had anything. i didnt think it to be a big deal other than the fact that even then, i was not respected. i rlly never knew you and that’s the best way to get closure. just understanding that you never missed out on something not there. i like doing what’s fair, yet my freedom is compromised and idk why. i think i want to be free to make decisions and im in no rush to find my soulmates of friends or partner. i know u think ur better than whoever it will be, that ur better than anyone who has ever been m friend or liked me. and to that i say, at least then i never had my freedom taken away. lol. i just wish sometimes u were more like me, that way you can just rlly focus on what you want and have ways to express things without hurting ppl. idk. i know ur prob shit talking me somewhere else or plotting something. im rlly done with that. i dont have emotions other then occasional anger at the cruel things you say or numbness or afraid when i was threatened. when i long for something it is not this. yet its taken as a lie. im not lying.