i feel like my nerves are on fire. i’ve been sitting in your corner of my bed, silently hoping that you’d come through my door. i don’t care what the reason is, or what you did to get inside, i just want your heartbeat. i’m scared of a diagnosis, i don’t want to live with this pain. i don’t want to die with it either, but maybe it’d be easier if i stopped fighting it off. i have days where i can barely get out of bed, my legs refuse to work with me. i don’t want to be alone, not right now. you don’t care about me, do you? but you used to, and it hurts because i need to feel normal. even if it’s for a second, a few minutes, a night. the moment im left alone with my thoughts, and the sun has set deep in the sky, i break down. i think of you, too. please talk to me, please it doesn’t have to mean anything. i just can’t be alone anymore, not like this. let me hide where your jaw bleeds into your neck, i can’t take any of this anymore. a little while, that’s all im asking. make up a lie, a spanish project or something. please, just come back for a moment. even if you yell, or say nothing, i just need you to touch me.
-🧊🍎