Hey Alexis. I can’t bear to actually send this to you but I want to say I miss you almost everyday. We aren’t considered “not friends any more” but it nearly feels like it. I understand why you’re distanced, you want to be considered popular. Just like Jaxon did. You hated that he chose popular people over us but here you are doing the same. I’m not angry at you for it. It feels strange that we were inseparable only a few months ago. You made summer actually bearable for me, when we’d call everyday and you were sure I was all you had. When our friend group split after Lily moved, I wasn’t scared because I was sure that if I had you everything would be okay. I would tell you about old friends that chose new people over me and you’d be angry. I never would’ve thought you’d be one of them too. I’m scared to make new friendships because I can’t trust they won’t eventually leave because I thought you were the one person that wouldn’t ever and here we are. Seeing you repost or post things about how you’ve changed yourself to be popular and how you aren’t the girl you were only hurts even more despite the fact I already knew it. Seeing you admit it feels worse. I’m not sure how I’ll be able to handle the rest of the school year without you. The friends I’ve built as a foundation around me so it doesn’t feel like I’m as lonely don’t help because they simply aren’t you. I wonder if you still like what you used to, stuff that’s considered childish now. I wonder if you still have deep thoughts and aren’t truly the two-dimensional person it seems you are now. I thought you were so cool in 5th grade when I met you, our friend group would always imagine us living right next to each other or starting a band. I couldn’t believe it when you told me you used to love me more than friend. I thought you were way out of my league. I knew the dreams were silly but it never braced me for what’s happening now. There’s nobody I can truly talk to and will get me like you. I told you everything and you understood perfectly. Just like you told me everything and I got what you meant always. I hope one day I won’t be so bitter over this and will accept that life works this way and people will walk out your life constantly. I beg that you think of me every once and awhile, that you won’t forget me fully. Remember my existence when we’re older. The thought of you fully forgetting despite everything haunts me.